Priceless...

Last night when I was singing to Jackson at bedtime, he told me he wanted to do his bible study with me, as I did mine in the morning...just us. It melted my heart.

This morning...

Creighton is laying next to me in bed, asleep. I am wishing to be still asleep, but not. I hear him walk into the room, and up next to me. I open my eyes to hear,

[in whisper] "Mommy, lets go do our bible study to-geder"

Oh...man. I haven't woken up in a better mood in a long time. And we did just that.

Happy Momma.

Great Expectations?!

Last night Jeff and I went on our date and it was great. There is this little place (new) in town called Frank and Lola's. It is such good food. We have been 3 times now and every time we love it. Jeff says its in the top 3 places ever for his steaks he loves. That is saying something. The prices are decent, but on the expensive end for our little town. The wait can be long though. Last night we got there and they said 20 minutes and 55 minutes later we were seated. I get kinda grouchy when that happens...am I spoiled or what? The funny thing is with me is that if they would have just SAID a hour, I would have been delighted to have only waited 55 minutes. It's all about expectations. I do the same thing to Jeff. When he says he'll be home at one time and then doesn't get home till minutes or hours later, I get really frustrated, but just like with the table/waiting, if I had been told the time originally I wouldn't have been upset at all. Am I weird or is everyone like that?

We had a great date. Great food. Great conversation. Great company.

Afterwards we came home and he told me the movie I had been waiting for came in the mail. I was so excited, so we watched it, well, rather I watched it. The Secret Life of Bees, which I read earlier this month. I have been waiting for the movie ever since. The movie, which I have been told NEVER hold up the credibility of the book, did just that. It was a good movie, but the book was great. However, I did like the way they ended the movie better than the book...so it was a good balance for me :) ever the fantasy, all-is-well-that-ends-well kinda person.

I guess it's another good thing about being a believer...

Sentimental Time.

This week hasn't been as busy as the previous two, but still I feel just swamped with things. Here we are ending February and I feel as if I should re-evaluate and grade myself again on my goals for the year. Are years long to anyone else, or is it just me!? :)

Anyway, life is good here. I got some sweet time with Jeff today, just the two of us for several hours and that was so good for my soul and our relationship. We also have a date night planned tomorrow night for a few hours with the kids at Parents Night Out. (PS, if you live in bartlesville its open to everyone, and there is no where I'd rather leave my kids, with exception of my own family).

Stacie is home and not really doing very well, but still is with us. There are lots of people volunteering to do great things for her both monetarily and most importantly with their time and hearts. It's really uplifting to see the good in people, in our community, coming together and wrapping this family in love...all kinds of love. And I love it. I don't know how much longer God has her here, and goodness knows she is ready to go Home, but her life, both in struggle and worldly "defeat" have NOT been in vain. Within her, there is a fighter, even when she doesn't want to be. I can't imagine the things she thinks of and wonders and fears... She is strong.

Jeff is seeing Braveheart on the big screen tonight and so fired up about it! I am happy for him because he loves it so much. On our wedding day, one of the ministers, Will Cunningham, called him Braveheart... :) He wore his kilt even... WOW. I love this man for everything...but especially for all the things he is I will never be. This is one of them.

I feel very blessed, even though I also feel stressed at times. God is good and He is doing mighty works here. Right now. I love it.

My kids...I love them. I love them I love them. They drive me bonkers at times, but man...they are just good and I am so proud and honored to be their mommy.

Tonight in the tub, Jackson let me know that he knows almost all the major colors in Spanish. I knew they worked on them, but this kid is quite smart. He is paying attention, even when it doesn't look like it. He catches everything. And I love this boy more than the world itself. Even when he changes costumes 154 times in 5 minutes. He loves them all so much he can't decide which one he wants to be more. I laugh. A lot. At him and with him. He's good for my health.

My little Miss Princess is everything I am and everything I am not...all at the same time. She prances and very dramatically dances and spins around this house in dresses, necklaces, purses, tiaras, and heels one minute and the next is "bumper" naked and sitting reading on the couch. She is like two people in one body and no one EVER knows who will come out/go in and at what time or place. She is a wild card. Whew. She's crazy...awesome. And I love her.

Sentimental time is over...now.

Weekend Madness

This weekend:

1) Stacie made it home and actually is doing better than expected (last I heard). Praise the Lord!

2) I held two newborns this weekend. Well, I held my friend's 8 pound 2 ounce, 24 hour old, Koby, and then I held my other friend's, Tammy, little TINY 5 pound, 10 week old. Ethan! He was literally like half the size of Koby! It was unbelievable. It almost made me want another one holding the two of them in the same day...but I don't. I decided it was really great to snuggle them and kiss them and then walk out the door :)

3) I had some sweet by myself (to myself) time early Saturday through around 3 on Saturday. Then I had a fantastic time with 5 of my girlfriends as we bombarded my parents house (that they very sweetly evacuated for the weekend). We ate, laughed, giggled, cried, played wii, played games, talked, and talked and talked and talked some more. I stayed up till at least 3 and some of them longer. It was so good. I LOVE fellowship, I love friends.

4) I am now oh so very tired though. Good night

Pray for Stacie

She is coming home this afternoon. She should arrive at the Bartlesville Airport. The doctors have warned Luke that she might not make the flight home. So, we can all pray for that to happen. Stacie is not making a lot of sense when she talks, but they were able to remove lots of toxic fluid from her body, so hopefully she'll be able to rest comfortably in her home soon.

Then, there are many things that are needed financially for the family. One simply being groceries. If you would want to donate any amount of money towards this family, please contact me and I will get you set up with the right people. Or there is a need for meals, if you would be willing to make a meal for them (specifically this weekend).

Sparkling White!

Tonight I was given the awesome opportunity to speak at a new ministry called Loving Roots. It is designed to love and support, come alongside, provide care for, and educate young soon-to-be-mothers, most unwed. It is awesome.

They asked me to speak on Purity. That is a tough task for sure. She specifically wanted it to be on Sexual Purity...and even tougher task. I was so nervous. I was scared. I was slightly unprepared (only really my fault). However, God was calming. He filled the room with His word and hopefully their hearts. Tonight I was just a vessel. And that was such a good place to be.

I had this idea (because I am visual) to have some sort of physical picture of what it would be like to start out pure, have sin all over, and then become pure again. Since this is where we all are in life...in need of constant redemption, forgiveness and grace.

My first idea and trial run failed miserably. I tried water, food coloring, and bleach. Then, Jeff and I went to Walmart to figure out how we could make it better. And we did! (or rather, I'll let God have the credit).

We got a white t-shirt. A red marker. And some Oxy-clean. (that stuff is awesome)

During the talk I spoke of God's original plan of purity and how we were made in his image and I brought out the shirt. I told them that our ultimate goal is to stand before Christ in his coming confident and unashamed (pure). The hard part was in the middle...the life part.

Insert: sin, fall of man, us (and the red pen)

I asked them to list off things that the world throws at us that cause us to be impure. They did a really great job of this. Our shirt was filled with red words all over it...from top to bottom.

Insert: God, forgiveness (and the oxyclean)

We went on to talk of how we can set boundaries for ourselves in all areas of life (not just sexual) from things we hear, see, touch, consume, etc.

Then I took the shirt from the water and wrung it out. SPARKLING WHITE.

Isaiah 1:18 Come now, let us reason together," says the LORD. "Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.

I got more out of preparing for the talk than I had planned. God had a message for me in it all. I wanted to share because I was so grateful, and because well...God is just good. And I wanted to share that.

Coming Home!

It's truly the hand of God in the miracle of Stacie being flown home tomorrow. She has recovered from surgery and is in a trasportable state/stable enough to come home. Praise be to the Lord! Her days are still numbered, but at least she will be home and be able to be loved on and cared for there with her girls!

Thanks for praying!

Update on Urgent

Update on Stacie

An aunt took a loan out in order to pay for Stacie's eldest daughter (8) and the grandmother to fly out to Orlando for 36 hours to visit/say goodbye. They left Neala (1) at home with other friends and family. They are transporting Stacie today to another hospital in Orlando to have another 5 hour operation done on her kidneys to try and get all of the toxic fluids out of her system. Luke is spending time with Zoe today, so that is a blessing for her, and probably a much needed break from the hospital for both of them.

Our prayers need to be for her to survive the surgery and that they are successful in removing all of the toxins from her body. Hopefully if they are able to get her to a stabilized place, then we have made contact with an amazing organization called Angel Flights to hopefully get her home to be with her girls until the Lord takes her home to be with Him. This has been so aggressive! It's just so sad. She is only 28 years old! I just can't fathom all of it. The worry, the pain, the amazing financial stress!

Just please pray. And thank you for those of you who responded to the previous post...

URGENT Prayer Request/Need

There is a family (Gudenkauf's) in our town who are in desperate need of everyone hitting their knees for them! Please pray for Stacie, Luke and their two young daughters in this time of craziness for all of them.

Stacie was diagnosed with a terminal and very fast form of cancer and was given a few months to live. Someone was very sweet and sent them to Disney (all 4 of them) for a last family vacation (maybe a first, too). While they were there, Stacie became VERY ill and was hospitalized. During this time they took her colon and she is in a toxic state and critical. It is only a matter of time. But while Luke and Stacie are in the hospital in Florida, their girls were sent back to Bartlesville to be with a grandmother. Her days are numbered and she is sick with worry she will not be able to say goodbye to her babies!

Their medical insurance will not pay for them to be air flighted home. They need someone to provide this service to them with a private plane. They cannot afford what bills have already accrued for them in the past year. They must have a medical staff person aboard the flight as well as Stacie and Luke... and they need this soon.

If you know of ANYone who might be able to help them out either financially or with a plane, please contact me at bergcourtney [at] yahoo [dot] com

Thank you for praying, it is the very least we can do. They need a miracle.

A Valentine's Well Spent!

Happy Belated Love Day...

Jeff brought home some of the flowers from the Father Daughter Banquet and put them in a vase for me :) We don't celebrate (or make a big deal out of) Valentine's Day really, but he's pretty sweet...and they're free...gotta love that!

The kids gave us a nice "present" by sleeping in late! Woohoo! I had to wake her up! BTW isn't she precious when she's sleeping?

So I made Jeff a heart shaped pizza (from scratch) with all his favorite ingredients on it! And of course the beloved Dr. Pepper and crushed ice! :)

One of our favorite Valentine's Day past times is to go to Hallmark and pick out 2 cards for each other, one sappy, one funny. When both of us are finished finding them, we meet up in the middle of the store and read them! We laugh and hug and kiss and then put the cards back and walk out...without spending a dime! for a card(s) that will most likely get tossed at some point However, with the week we had that didn't happen this year...oh well. No sweat here. There's always next year! :)

I am thankful that my hubby dotes on me and loves me very well usually 365 days a year! I am glad he doesn't need a Hallmark holiday to tell him to do so. I feel very blessed! And we are a lot richer for it...both financially and emotionally!

* And I forgot to put in here the first publish that I curled Creighton's hair and she loved it, but I think she doesn't even look like the same person! :)

**Don't forget to check out what the kids did during the day in the post below!**

For my good friend Sarah! ;)

I wanted to post this on Valentine's Day, but who's counting?! This is for my friend Sarah who had Beyonce's Single Ladies on her website for the "occasion." The chorus lyrics, at least the ones that I 'know' are as follows...
Cuz if you like it then you shoulda put a ring on itIf you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it ...Cuz if you like it then you shoulda put a ring on itOh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!Whoa! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Apparently I went to Sarah's blog and left it on too often and this is what happens...

DISCLAIMERS:

1.excuse the messy house.

2. I don't love the lyrics that I JUST read on the website...but oh well...had to share anyway...

3. and yes, he still sings it around the house...I'm thinking that's not a good thing

Spent. Spending.

It's funny. The last three days my "day" part of the day has been amazing. I have been spending lots of time with my kids and loving it. I spent some time reading (okay a LOT of time reading. I finished the book "The Secret Life of Bees" by Sue Monk Kidd that I started briefly at the Women's Retreat. I finished it this morning.) I LOVED the weather on Tuesday morning/afternoon, not so much the evening tornado...but hey, who's saying anything about the evenings yet. I took my kids to the zoo today and although it was completely gross outside and freezing, we had a blast..and were the ONLY ones crazy enough to be there except for one other lone little family, who were not English speaking.

And yet, my evening, all of the past three have just been nuts. I think I am spending so much more of my emotional and physical energy with the kids than I have in the past that after about 4, I am just spent. It's awful to think of it that way. I am just exhausted though. I know I haven't been going to bed a decent hour though too, so partly it is that, but wow. I mean...from tornado/storm weather to stress galore with youth/church stuff to wild banshee children (it's like after 4 they feel the same way I do :)) I am just beside myself with how I am going to handle it each and every day. I am wiped out. Spent.

It's good though. I guess. This morning I couldn't take my eyes off my daughter. Seriously. It was crazy. I have always thought she was beautiful, but in a motherly bias sorta way. Today, there was no doubt on earth that she was beaming the Savior's image, her beauty was stunning me to silence and pure awe. I think it's because I have been spending more time with her, knowing her, loving her. I just was soaking it all in. She's gorgeous. She is becoming her own. She is growing up before my very eyes. And I love her. And I know she is gorgeous.

I just hope that we can train her up right. For the time being, I feel as if we've failed her in a lot of ways. She can be downright mean for no reason and sassy and as hardheaded as they could possibly come. She will be a leader one day, no doubt. I just want her to lead the right way, to the right thing. I'm not gonna lie, I am a little scared at this point. It is the hardest thing in the world to get her to do anything that isn't on her time, her thought, her schedule. I am so out of ideas with her. Thank goodness I am not in control. But at the same time I know I do have the responsibility of training her up and guiding her in a direction we feel is right. I MUST get on my knees more often for her. It'll take a miracle! :) But dang, watch out...either way...she's a furious storm, a tornado in her own, a NATURAL disaster WONDER. And she's temporarily mine...:)

Taxes...

I spent the whole day working on our taxes for 2008. I feel so much better because they are done. Almost completely. I just have to mail the state ones in and wait for our refunds. I forgot briefly that we really rely on our refund to make it to birthdays and Christmas. It it always funny how I feel like we get more back than we could possibly pay in taxes. I think it is just a small blessing from God actually! And that delights my heart. Thank you Lord (and Uncle Sam).

And not at all that I get anything from this, but I highly recommend using TaxCut as it is SO easy. I used to use Turbo Tax but Tax Cut is cheaper, easier, user-friendly, and if anything were to go wrong you get free audit help! You have a few months to do them, but I like getting them done and out of the way.

Whew...one down.

(and my kids were at school and jeff was at work, so I neglected no one but myself...I should really shower at some point)

Erin!

My friend Erin came up for her birthday back in the middle of January! It was such a good visit but I just haven't used the camera much since then, or posted pics, so they were all on the camera still. I have been meaning to post about her trip and how much I love her, but time got away from me... Anyway I have lots of pics from January to post soon. But here are a few from her weekend with us! Funny thing was we were dressed up the entire weekend except these pics and I didn't take ANY others. I have some video of the kids dancing around like crazy people while Erin was here. But that's all... Wish we would have taken a "nice" one.

And for those of you who don't know Erin, yes, she is tall. We played volleyball at TU together, and BTW, E, I want my sweatshirt back ;P

Erin, we love you and loved it and felt honored you chose to spend your birthday with us! I wouldn't mind if we made it a ritual--but you might have more entertaining ways to spend your birthday :)

A Ladies Retreat Worth Mentioning

I spent the weekend in the middle of nowhere, OK with a bunch (25 to be specific) women from Grace. I was so hesitant to go because I just don't LOVE doing things like that. It gets me quite far from my comfort zone in every sense of the word. Where it all together was different than what I expected, it was good. I sincerely LOVE LOVE LOVE fellowship with "more birthday-ed" women of faith. I just do. I loved Apples of Gold for the very same reasons. There just is something that cannot be replicated Dalene, is that word?.

Anyway, I am way behind in a million things of life at the moment...but not ironically our weekend was spent with John Ortberg teaching about temporary versus eternal. I must say I learned a lot and put it into practice when I got home. I "needed" to do so many things, but I didn't do any of them...except that which matters. I spent time with my children and my husband and loved every minute of it. Well at least until Jeff left me alone with them and they were holy terrors at bed time. Up until that time they were amazing and I could tell were responding in every way positive to how much of my time and attention they were getting. It was awesome.

So, thank you John Ortberg and all the sweet and awesome ladies that put together this little retreat/seminar and made me attend. It was good for my soul and I am just beginning on the journey of how much I actually learned by putting it into action.

I am WAY excited to eat my own food, sleep in my own bed, with only my husband in the room, and not have to be anywhere at 8am though :)

Seriously...

I so INJURED myself. Real bad!

I swear I am bleeding internally, but maybe it just feels that way. However, if I happen to not wake up tomorrow, this is why.

My muscles are so fatigued from this Boot Camp that I am pushing myself overboard in because I am way too competitive that today when I went to play volleyball FOR FUN I completely and totally KILLED myself my stomach muscle. I believe I tore it, but if it isn't torn it is COMPLETELY the worst strain/sprain I have EVER in all my life had.

I am in dire pain and all I can do is ice, rest and take advil.

One hit. ONE. I am out for a long time I would think, if today's pain level is ANY indication to the severity of the muscle tear/sprain/strain.

Does anyone know HOW MUCH you use your abs. I can't do anything without it screaming at me. It's terrible. I like being active. Now breathing is requiring effort and pain.

The One.

Well, when I wrote my last post, I wasn't doing so well. I can say that I am doing much better now. It's not because I have all the answers. But I do have One. The only One that matters. He is in control and He knows what He is doing. I have faith in that and that is what gets me to a place where I can trust and hope, even in the unknown. Even when it hurts, even when it hurts more than I thought I could handle. I haven't cried so hard in a very long time...I think the build up was getting too much. It was a good time for my soul, although hard. It was a good time to bond with my husband, although I think he might think otherwise, or atleast hopes for other bonding opportunities in different ways :)

God was good to me, even when I was very angry at Him. He was gentle with me, and He was peace-giving, comforting, loving, and so faithful, when I was so not. We serve a mighty God. In the good I will praise Him, and in the bad, I will praise Him.

A Million Questions...

My heart is heavily burdened. I can't remember the last time I cried myself to sleep, but last night was a first of many for me. I can't really bare to go into all the details, nor do I think I should on my blog. But I would ask for prayer. Prayer for me as I wrestle with God. Prayer for a sweet family as they walk a road no parent, no sibling should (and one I know some of you have walked already before them). My heart is just hurting. My soul is just not okay. My mind...well that is where it starts to get ugly and I need the most prayer.

The questions are coming in my the millions and I have no answers. Not one.